Select an Assignment

[Nukegrrrl]

For one month, carry a sack of potatoes with you everywhere. Never let it leave your side, with the exception of taking showers or other activities that potatoes absolutely cannot particpate in. Report the results here after a month has passed.


Start a positive rumor about someone or something. Wait until it travels back to you and see how the rumor changed and effected people as it was passed around.

Peace,
Jenney

[DJ Rawkus]

Unfortunately, I only see one of these assignments having any meaningful results..and it ain't the potatoes.

[.-=PSYLON=-.]

Can I carry a sack of cheerios instead ? Potatos are heavy.

[Galen]

I had to do this back in middleschool or something I think, for health class. It was supposed to represent what it's like to have a baby and have to carry it around all the time. Waste of potatoes in my opinion, particularly since many people didn't take such great care of their potato babies.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Originally posted by Galen
I had to do this back in middleschool or something I think, for health class. It was supposed to represent what it's like to have a baby and have to carry it around all the time. Waste of potatoes in my opinion, particularly since many people didn't take such great care of their potato babies.

I had a friend in middleschool who had to carry around one of those baby dolls that have recorders in them to track a student's interaction with their psuedo-child. . . and me and my mom took turns chucking the baby off our second story balcony. It was cool. The baby "cried" and everything.

Good times.

-K

[balloon kitten]

Originally posted by Nukegrrrl
Start a positive rumor about someone or something. Wait until it travels back to you and see how the rumor changed and effected people as it was passed around.
Ummm, ok. HexRei is the best mod ever! *waits for 30 days*

[Vixie]

Originally posted by Galen
I had to do this back in middleschool or something I think, for health class. It was supposed to represent what it's like to have a baby and have to carry it around all the time. Waste of potatoes in my opinion, particularly since many people didn't take such great care of their potato babies.
We had 10lb bags of sugar that we had to carry around for a week. One of my friends named his Dammit. I thought it was great. ( The name...not the project )

[Nukegrrrl]

Originally posted by emerald kitten

Ummm, ok. HexRei is the best mod ever! *waits for 30 days*
LOL! And Rawkus, meaniingfulness was never implied. Only absurd fun. :D

[HexRei]

*does "best mod ever" dance*

<--- fully of wacky dances

[MustHaveLust]

I heard this one girl, Nuke grrrl, got this boobjob that made her a size G.

is that positive?:d

[EviLreD]

Originally posted by KnottyGirl


I had a friend in middleschool who had to carry around one of those baby dolls that have recorders in them to track a student's interaction with their psuedo-child. . . and me and my mom took turns chucking the baby off our second story balcony. It was cool. The baby "cried" and everything.

Good times.

-K

yet another reason you are never allowed to have children :D (although I definitely might consider adopting one as a replacement for Razi;) )

[Yode]

Don't potatoes mold after awhile?

*twitch*

[HexRei]

Originally posted by Yode
Don't potatoes mold after awhile?

*twitch*

Not for a long long time, but in the meantime they sprout creepy tentacle roots.

[Tracered]

Hmmmm, did any of those potato children sprout creepy roots? 'Cuz I think its bad if a child sprouts creepy roots and stuff. Right?

[EV]

Day One, August 11th

Today, I decided to undertake the Herculean task of carrying around a potato sack "everywhere." (Thanks for the inspiration, Nukegrrrl).

Figuring that my job allows me enough personal leeway - and is, also, sedentary - my daylight hours should not provide too many opportunities for failure. My current work day includes an 8am - 5pm shift in a cubicle. I generally do not desire to leave this cubicle due to irrational fear of invoking 'friendly conversation' with my co-workers.

Rationale tells me that carrying the sack of potatoes to-and-fro the cubicle every morning and evening will defiitely insipre a few beneath-breath-utterances from nosy peers, but they already mutter consistently; at least now they will have ammunition for their petty concerns.

I have enough allies in my department - allies that are aware of my proclivities, mind you - that this shouldl go over well and relatively unnoticed, or uncared for.

Anticipating those post-work hours, this becomes tricky. My parking lot is six blocks from work, and this presents a logistical problem, specifically if it rains within the next month.

The home/sleep hours should be pretty self-explanatory, and I do not envision any problems during these periods.

A huge roadblock is encountered within the confines of my personal life & my 'dispensible hours' - and here I am asking for leeway - especially considering I have recently started dating a woman with high potential. My caveat for providing reports will be that the sack of potatoes is permitted to remain in my car throughout the duration of any romantic interludes. You have my assurances that I will notify my SO as soon as I feel the relationship has reached that fully 'open & comfortable' stage.

I also envision problems when attending a destination in the public forum; a club, a ballgame, a restaurant. I reserve the right to use discretion and leave the sack of potatoes in my car - for these intents & purposes, on my person - so as not to cause a dilemma or entirely awkward situation for all involved.

I do not know what else to expect, but will accept this assignment - Assignment One, from Nukegrrrl - with full diligence and positive intentions. I hope I do not let you down.

I am off to QFC to purchase potatoes, and will report back as soon as that element is completed.

8:35pm: The project begins now. The U-District QFC was quite crowded, but there is nothing noteworthy to report aside from one conversation:
Me [to QFC employee, caucasian male, est. age 28]: "Excuse me, do you guys have sacks of potatoes?"
Emp: "We sure do, last aisle."
[Emp walks me over to potatoes]
Emp: "We have the five-pound bags for $2.99 or the ten-pound bags for $3.99, so uh..that's the better deal." [smiles in flirtatious sense; I wonder sarcastically if I gave him that kind of vibe or if he just has so much game that it oozes out during all exhanges]
[I decide to purchase the ten-pound bag, walk to checkout counter and pay $4.32].

I am currently at home - and probably will remain as such - for the entire evening. Until tomorrow...

NOTE: Daily reports will not be this comprehensive, but I figure that background is needed to provide an accurate foundation for this project, thus holding true to the scientific principles and conventions.


EV

Edited to reflect purchase of potatoes.

[balloon kitten]

Originally posted by HexRei
*does "best mod ever" dance*

So is it official that you're no longer ignoring me? ;)

[Nukegrrrl]

You've made me so very happy, LA2SeattlEV. :)

Several years ago, I took on the potato assignment. I was a junior at Kamiak High School, a place better known for educating Tim Eyman's kids and teen girls with boob jobs than it is for toleration of eccentricities. For several months I carried around my beloved 10 pound sack of potatoes named Barky.

Every morning Barky was cradled lovingly in my arms or nestled in my lap as I attended classes. During weight training class, Barky moved around from machine to machine with me, wearing his own support belt. During art, he would sit on the stool next to me, eagerly awaiting my next sketch of his lumpy physique.

When we weren't in class, we would ride the Mukilteo Ferry or comb thrift stores, searching for belts, ties, and other accessories that potato sacks can wear. Barky was most fond of fake gold chains, as many folks in South Everett are.

Eventually Barky sprouted too many little shoots and as he grew wrinkly and older (potatoes don't mold, they shrivel), I opened him and planted potato children for him.

Initially many people feigned disgust, but eventually most people's hearts warmed up to Barky, and expressed affection by asking how he was doing, inviting him to parties, offering to keep him company and whatever it is friends do for each other.

Although lugging around a sack of potatoes may seem stupid, it is stupid and that is what makes it fun. It also attracts friends.

Peace,
Jenney

[EV]

Day Two, August 12th

I'm checking in early so as to accurately reflect my work day up to this point.

Though I have yet to name my sack of potatoes (suggestions welcomed, ps), I can already see the ten-pound weight taking its toll. The walk from my parking lot to the office was unbearably hot (even that early), and carrying the sack as well as my work bag is quite umm...inconvenient. I received a few looks during the course of my walk, but this could be due to my overconscious awareness of other people.

Once at work, I was greeted quizzically (sp) by the few co-workers that were around when I arrived. Nobody said anything outright - typical of my 'peers,' just the familiar 'smile and nod,' with gossip and "what is he doing with the potatoes" to come later, amongst themselves, I'm sure - so I settled into my cube and began to proceed with my day.

I have left the potatoes on my desk for the entire duration of the day, and have had three inquiries of note:
1) My buddy & sole true ally at the company, Adrian, asked, "what's up with the potatoes, dog?" To which I replied, "I'm helping a friend (Nukegrrrl aka Jenney, nice to meet you. I guess this makes us friends ;)) with some scientific research," etc...He didn't seem too taken aback - or even surprised for that matter - and proceeded to ask only a few other questions, including "are you really gonna carry that thing around everywhere?" and "Homeboy, I think you're crazy if you think you're going to do this for a month." Thank you. Thank you very much,
ally.

2) This wacky, I-wish-I-was-the-life-of-the-office-but-even-though-I'm-not-I'll-still-act-like-it type named Lorraine actually picked up the sack of potatoes and started carrying it around. I did not feel that it was worth my time nor effort to explain to her the full extent of the project, so I complied with her actions and allowed her to act 'silly' and stupid for the duration of her attention. The only direct interaction about the potatoes verbally entailed a simple, "why do you have these, anyway," to which I replied, "because it's something I have to do for a month." She walked away with no further comment or question.

3) My boss Laurie - a kind, understanding, friendly boss - said, "Potatoes? You going to share with everybody?" I told her the same deal and explained that this would go on for thirty days and not to worry about it. I don't remember the exact phrasing, but she followed up with something like, "so long as we all get mashed potatoes in September, I'll be happy." Umm...okay.

That's it for now. I'll edit & update if anything noteworthy or exciting happens between now and bedtime. So far, I'm thinking that a) for sheer entertainment value, it'd be a good idea to mix it up a little bit and go somewhere besides work -and- b) I wonder if a sack of potatoes counts as an extra person for carpool purposes on the way home.

Will keep you posted.


EV

[EviLreD]

how 'bout terre? (as in pomme de terre - Fr. for potato - oh, I am sooo witty:rolleyes: ):Dor:
Ivan
Frida
Spuds
um..Fifi?

[hookerw/a penis]

Hahahaha.

LA2SeattleEv is cool.
Hahaha

[EV]

Day Three, August 13th

DAY TWO UPDATE: Interesting scenario with Deka, the girl whom I have recently started dating. After she left work, she came to my apartment, at which point - well, not immediately - I proceeded to explain the potato saga, to which she replied, "that seems like a waste of time, but that's just me."

Ouch.

I was going to justify the project, but the relationship is going well otherwise and I didn't want to bother jeopardizing anything, at least not over a sack of potatoes (sorry, Nukegrrrl).

So I left the sack of potatoes on the counter and nary a word was uttered until she was about to leave, when she confided that "it's not a stupid idea, exactly, but I don't see the point."

I felt better, and explained my motivation: Why Not? Why not accept a challenge and follow through, citing unanticpatable results and a breadth of human reaction in the process? She seemed pleased, or at least did a good job placating me.

Moving on to DAY THREE, work was much the same, except it IS DAMN HOT and lugging around a ten-pound sack of potatoes for six blocks is not fun. I am still at work, and definitely not looking forward to the walk back to my car; not in 90+ degrees. Reminds me of the SF Valley at this point, incidentally.

Anyway, nobody had any noteworthy comments, aside from my boss, who seemed somewhat surprised that I brought them in "again."

To summarize up to this point, the project has been easier than I imagined, though my life has been somewhat mundane throughout these three days.

I'm going to a BBQ tonight, so that will be my first true 'outing' for the assignment. I will report back later, or perhaps tomorrow.

Until then,


EV

[tekkno30]

im too poor to afford a sack of potatoes.....lol that would be a luxery for me haha

[Iokera]

My screen name before iokera was potato_spanker. Just thought I'd put some input in this potato discussion.

peace

[EviLreD]

Originally posted by LA2SeattlEV [/i]
[b]Day Three, August 13th
DAY TWO UPDATE: Interesting scenario with Deka, the girl whom I have recently started dating. After she left work, she came to my apartment, at which point - well, not immediately - I proceeded to explain the potato saga, to which she replied, "that seems like a waste of time, but that's just me."

Ouch.

If she can't accept your potatoes, are you really sure she's THE ONE????

I'm going to a BBQ tonight, so that will be my first true 'outing' for the assignment.
You better keep a close eye on you bundle - not exactly the safest place for an unattended sack of potatoes, now is it??

[tallcan]

Originally posted by Nukegrrrl
For one month, carry a sack of potatoes with you everywhere. Never let it leave your side, with the exception of taking showers or other activities that potatoes absolutely cannot particpate in. Report the results here after a month has passed.


Start a positive rumor about someone or something. Wait until it travels back to you and see how the rumor changed and effected people as it was passed around.

Peace,
Jenney

I still dont understand why you cant take the potatoes in when you shower.

[Iokera]

You have a very extensive vocabulary, and I find that you are about twice as smart as me. I do think I had a little steam coming out of my ears, but that might be from the 100 degree weather.... Who knows?

peace

[tallcan]

Originally posted by lisam
you try putting potatoes in the shower with you then carrying them around all the time :p

they'll sprout in a bit even w/o being drenched

you could dry them off...
or, for an extra challenge...let them sprout.

[LunaLizz]

was handed down to me from the almighty norshgock, god of all walking toasters.he said to light stuff on fire. *BURN*

[EviLKat]

Shhhh, but EK told me that HexRei is pregnant. Don't tell anyone though.

[balloon kitten]

Why would I say that? Hex(Ttruth) told me he used a condom! ;)

[EviLKat]

Originally posted by Nukegrrrl
Wait until it travels back to you and see how the rumor changed and effected people as it was passed around.


*Shrugs* That's what I got from it. :rolleyes: :p

[balloon kitten]

Hold on there, fellow EK. :D The request was to start a positive rumor. That boy don't need to be offspringin' any time soon.

[EV]

Day Four, August 14th

ANNOUNCEMENT: THE POTATOES ARE NOW NAMED "VIAZA," PRONOUNCED "FAY-ZEE." THIS TERM IS SWAHILI FOR...POTATO, AND WAS SUGGESTED BY DEKA.

DAY THREE UPDATE: The barbeque last night was fairly interesting, at least from the perspective of Viaza. I arrived - sack in hand - to the Northgate apartment at approximately 6:50pm. There were six people, excluding myself, four of whom I had chilled with on previous occassions. Comfortable atmosphere; bloody beer was the drink of choice, and carne asada, tortillas & homemade pico de gallo were on the 'menu.'

The prerequisite question-and-answer session ensued regarding Viaza, and all participants seemed to handle the situation accordingly, with a few guffaws & snickers, and my first outright show of support. Adrian's roommate, also named Adrian (Martinez), claimed to have a similar project in 10th grade, except his was with an egg and was supposed to be treated as an infant. We discussed the merits of such an undertaking for about ten minutes, and he said I was doing "a good thing." Sweet.

As hours passed and beers were drained, Adrian's (Alvarado, co-worker/ friend) girlfriend Yesenia had what seemed like a good idea at the time, though I now feel rather guilty; to sacrifice one potato to the 'Potato Deity,' "to ensure positive health and good fortune" hroughout the duration of Vaiza's thirty-day shelf life.

We proceeded to open the sack and throw a potato on the grill, pieces of which were eventually doled out to be enjoyed by all. Nukegrrrl, I hope this is not a violation of the assingnment's parameters, but I figure since it's all in good fun, it shouldn't be a problem.

The rest of the night continued normally, until I arrived home, realizing that I had left Viaza at Adrian's apartment. This was the first evidence of irresponsibility, and I blame the alcohol. I diligently went back to retrieve my trusty sack, and hope that this near-tragedy does not befall Vaiza again...

This morning brought an unexpected conversation involving the potatoes, this time from the Attendant in my work parking lot, wearing a shirt with the name, 'Caesar.'
C: "Hey, man - how come I see you with those [potatoes] every day?"
EV: "Oh, it's a little project that I'm doing."
C: "Project? For school?"
EV: "No - it's an independent study kind of thing."
C: "For work?"
EV: "No - on my own volition, actually."
C: "Well what is it for?"
EV: "A friend is doing an experiment and I'm reporting back my experiences to further her research."
C: "What kind of research is it?"
EV: "Honestly, I didn't get too in-depth with her. She's just somebody really close that wanted me to do a favor for her, so..."
C: "Are you gonna have this [sack] forever?"
EV: "Umm...no. Only for 30 days."
C: "What do you do afterward?"
EV: "It's only research, so we're reporting in the meantime and then I guess I toss 'em.
C: "Wow, okay. I'll see you later then."
EV: "Yeah, um...see you...umm...later."
This conversation was not only terribly taxing at 7:47 in the A.M., but has caused me to rethink my route and parking situation en route to my job. I do NOT want to be stuck in this kind of banter at that hour every day...

More later, kids.


EV

[EviLreD]

I told you what would happen if you took your potatoes to a barbecue, man!!:rolleyes:

[EviLKat]

It started positive... but look how it changed! :p

Gah, I'm such a geek. ;)

[angry_bob]

Good to see someone's actually doin it... :p

[HexRei]

Originally posted by EviLKat
Shhhh, but EK told me that HexRei is pregnant. Don't tell anyone though.
Heh. That doesn't surprise me, she sort of has an established history of making shit up on nwtekno :)

[balloon kitten]

Originally posted by HexRei

Heh. That doesn't surprise me, she sort of has an established history of making shit up on nwtekno :)
Much like you have an established history of posting about people you've got in "ignore". What is it, HexReRe? Am I worth your time or not? :D

[Nukegrrrl]

Originally posted by yowzers


I still dont understand why you cant take the potatoes in when you shower.
I guess you could do that if you wanted, but it may cause the taters to rot before a month's end.

[EV]

Day Five, August 15th

DAY FOUR UPDATE: We're down two potatoes at this point. Last night, Deka suggested that we bake one. Well, it wasn't really a 'suggestion,' per se - it was more of a capitulation on my part seeing as how she is giving me a fair amount of guff over the project. So I figure what better way to politicize than to involve her to the utmost capacity as a bystander? We picked Viaza's biggest baby, threw that sucker in the oven with my patented teryaki chicken and...burnt the hell out of it. I'd never baked a potato before, and the lack of insight - coupled with numerous distractions over the course of the cooking process - led me to char the potato to chthonic, infernal hell. The way I look at it, I'm willing to call it a sacrifice to the Nukegrrl Potato Gods.

As for today, there has been a deluge of inquisitive co-workers. As was anticipated on Day One (8/11), it seems word has not-so-mysteriously made it's way around the office to all of the miscellaneous sewing circles, grandma's bridge clubs and other notorious gossip groups. However, as most nosy people tend to be, most of these lookie-loos are content with simply peering into my cubicle, or coming in to ask a mundane question. What they expect to see boggles my mind; it's not as if I have a pound of coke cut up next to my keyboard, replete with razor blade, mirror and straws.

But such is life at CH2M Hill, as the daily travails of your average engineer is apparently filled with a vacuous nothingness...

As of now, my only plans for tonight are to talk to Mchll888 and catch the M's game.

Stay tuned for tomorrow, however, as I will be attempting to venture inside of a movie theatre to see 'Road to Perdition' with Deka & Viaza.

See you around.


EV

[EV]

Day Six, August 16th

This is a fucking debacle. I was late to work this morning and grabbed Viaza in haste while getting out of my car and *thud*bang*crump*bash*crash* the remaining potatoes fall out of the ill-sealed bag. Luckily, it didn't rip, but I felt like quite an ass picking up spuds (rep rep Trainspotting, ps), especially when Caesar came over. Not to help, of course, but to further taunt me for undertaking a voluntary project that can only cause headaches. Anyway, I'll tell you how it goes at Road to Perdition tonight.

This is the Return of the Debaclypse...



EV

[midnightmonica]

yeah i remember having to carry around a sugar baby in middle school to see what it was like having a baby. it didnt' work, 4 years later i had a kid and wow, a baby is much more work then a bag of sugar. i think its a pointless idea myself. .....

[balloon kitten]

Originally posted by midnightmonica
yeah i remember having to carry around a sugar baby in middle school to see what it was like having a baby. it didnt' work, 4 years later i had a kid and wow, a baby is much more work then a bag of sugar. i think its a pointless idea myself. .....

I know, what's the point? It's not like you can take part of a baby and make cookies with it. Unless... :eek:

[EV]

Day Seven, August 17th

DAY SIX UPDATE: First off, "Road to Perdition" is an excellent movie - go see it. As for Fiaza, the smart-ass ticket-seller guy asked me to purchase a ticket for the potatoes - which I immediately discarded as a joke - and continued to push for a purchase, even going as far as suggesting that I could but a child's ticket. I figured this was facetious, and ignored these requests...Luckily, my assumptions were correct and I continued into the theater with Deka. Once I encountered the ticket-taker, I don't know what the hell he was thinking, but he implored me to talk to 'Jason,' who is apparently in charge of food inventory for the theater. It turns out that he thought I was delivering the potatoes - yeah right, idiot; with my fucking girl in tow and dressed rather nicely - until I explained the situation in as little detail as possible, so as not to confuse this literal jackass. The rest of the evening progressed normally, and as I said, the movie was great. Hanks & Newman each ripped it up with their performances and the direction by Mendes was spectacular. The only thing I didn't like was the unnecessarily heavy-handed narration - out of nowhere - at the end, but as most big budget films tend to do, they needed to appeal to the lowest common denomination.

DAY SEVEN: I went to both Southcenter and Bellevue Malls, and decided to give Fiaza a well-deserved rest while shopping...Later in the evening I picked up my ex- & her best friend from SeaTac...both of them gave me unnecessary guff about the 'potato angle,' but I expected nothing less than this dynamic duo...

Today, I'm heading out to either Hempfest or Pike Place Market, and will bring Fiaza...

Back in a bit - thanks for the support.

EV

[EviLreD]

When do we get to see Viaza at her first rave??;)

*imagines large sack of potatoes being hoisted above head and walked through crowd to the vip room, each spud ablaze with personalized piece of glowing candy bead jewelry*

[KITA]

Originally posted by Nukegrrrl
For one month, carry a sack of potatoes with you everywhere. Never let it leave your side, with the exception of taking showers or other activities that potatoes absolutely cannot particpate in. Report the results here after a month has passed.


Start a positive rumor about someone or something. Wait until it travels back to you and see how the rumor changed and effected people as it was passed around.

Peace,
Jenney

a positive rumor? uuuummmmmmmmmmm lets see
OneLife productions is the best and they are going to be having a party on the 7th of sept. wildthings!!!!!!!!!
heres the info


NAME:WereTheWildThingsGrow
WHEN:Sept.7th,2002
Venue Ticket Info & Prices:
*NAF 6327 W. Marginal Way SW Seattle, Washington-98106
www.groundzeroevents.com /
1-888-531-8060

WASHINGTON:
First 100 presales are only $12 @ Frequency8, $25
thereafter available until 8/31 $30 @ door
LOCATIONS:
-Platinum Records-915 E. Pike St.- Seattle-(206)324-8032
-Frequency8-619 Broadway East-Seattle-(206)861-1488
-Betn8or Records-207 1/2 E. Holly
St.-Bellingham-(360)752-0626
-Divinyl-3843 N. 6th-Tacoma- (253)404-1075

OREGON:
Pre-sales available for $25 or $25 @ door w/Oregon I.D.
LOCATION:
-Platinum Records-104 SW 2nd Ave.-Portland-(503)222-9166

CANADA:
Pre-sales available for $30 (CAN)
LOCATIONS:
-Bassix-217 W Hastings St.-Vancouver, B.C.-(604)689-7734

www.ticketmaster.com

This is going to be the best party and sadly NAF's
last... contact me with any questions
FYI here is the play list...
**WILD THINGS STAGE:
*Christopher Lawrence:
Hook Recordings, Moonshine Hook Recordings UK,
Moonshine Records US Around the World CD release
party... What can we say-this guy is so good it hurts!
At this point it's harder to say what he hasn't
accomplished than what he has. Always headling
blockbuster events, Christopher is firmly established
as one of the highest-ranking DJs in the worl. Everyone
from CNN to URB, XLR8R to MTV celebrates Christopher's
ability to drive the crowd wild with his powerful,
intelligent mixes. We're bringing Christopher to Seattle to
flex that crate of wax that has made him a global
favorite!
*Digital Assasins:
Offworld LA Back to break it down for us one last time.
Our good friends Digital Assasins in one very special
last ever performance. Thats right this will be the
last show the Digital Assasins will EVER play and they
decided to do it with us. And let me tell you that they
plan to go out in style. Ashow for the books, a hard
breaking beat pounding performance by one of the best
this is NOT TO BE MISSED.
*Space Girl:
HardBeat Records NYC/ Moscow
Ohhhhhh Baby!!!! Does Space Girl rock or what! An
evolution of the DJ, Space Girl is brilliant shinning
light for the dance floor. The unrivaled magic of her
live P.A. performances shows no mercy for those
unprepared to dance hard. She doesn't come into your
life very often- don't miss her!
**EVOLUTION STAGE:
*B-Roe:
Youv'e seen him blow out the main room @ Hedonist
Masquerade and set the tone for what would become an
amazing night with DJ Micro @ Club NAF. B-Roe's
schedule has been non-stop, having worked on projects
with everyone from Tenaglia to Sandra Collons. B-Roe's
star is only rising. Take this opportunity to dive into
one of the best proogressive sets you'll ever hear.
*Andrei:
Emergency Records, Moscow
At only 21 years old andrei has accomplihed what it
takes most a lifetime to achieve. Already an
international headliner and producer hailing from
Moscow, Russia, he is set to take America by storm on
his Invasion USA tour. A thick and chunky progressive
stalwart ever vigilant, ever building, do not miss this
set!
*AJ "Spider" Sorbello:
Ground Zero, Sea
Spider has been pumping up crowds in the NW since 2000
and has made a name for himself as a smooth technical
mixer or genres from hard trance, banging
techno-house-break beat and scratching madness!

The Seattle Superstars:
Without whom no party would be complete, or as sweet.
**Flave (aka The Funkist) USC, Sea
**Vixens Of Vinyl MotorBoody, Sea
**DJXL Portland
**Lil Mz Booty Equality, Sea

ATTENTION ALL DJS!!!!
OneLife Promote Group and Ground Zero are running a
little contest!!!
How would you like a shot @ becoming the next superstar
DJ? The first step, opening the main room with
Christopher Lawrence! From there it is up to you, if we
like what we see then your in, a residency with OneLife
and Ground Zero and you know what that means!
We are going to be issuing special $30 pre-sale tickets
at all locations that will have a number on them, when
you purchase this ticket we will require you to fill
out some contact info which will allow us to ring you
with the good news. On August 31st we will randomly
pick one number and notify the lucky winner where and
when to arrive. Upon your arrival you will be presented
with an exclusive new set of wax for your big day, a
contract for an undisclosed sum, three VIP passes and
all the Superstar DJ treatment you can handle. These
tickets will be limited to 200. Get yours while they
last!!!!!!

LETS SEE WHAT RUMORS COME OUT OF THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

KITA

[EviLKat]

^^^^ Oh Jeebus... :p

[balloon kitten]

^^^
^^^
That was a waste of too much free time.

[EV]

Day Eight, August 18th

DAY SEVEN UPDATE: ]HEMP MUTHAFUCKIN' FEST!!! Great time...excellent, exciting, wonderful experience. Hell of a lot of good people; great booths; delicious food; positive vibe; perfect weather; damn fine music (the Casbah tent was phat) unexpectedly free parking; thankfully tolerant PD a kennel's worth of happy dogs, luscious, redolent smoke wafting through the air (especially on the beach)...yum;)

Anyway, mad ups to the Pot Pride people and any & all volunteers who worked to make this a productive, positive experience for all...

As for Viaza, she seemed to blend in quite naturally what with the crowd being as eclectic and acceptant (and high) as could be in a public setting. The people at the Gyro stand were commenting and I 'donated' them two potatoes (thus bringing us to a total of -5 from the original) for a) being so dope and b) having incredibly awesome gyros. One of the girls there - I forget her name; my apologies - had a similar project for a parenting class (?) when she was getting her G.E.D., so we shared some war stories, as well as a bowl later on:)

Nobody else really said much, though when I was on the beach side, there was this dope ass pitbull that could not stay out of the water, chasing everything in sight; sticks, tennis balls, food wrappers, you name it - and he came over and 'rassled with my sack (not that sack; get your mind outta the gutter) until her owner was kind enough to distract her with some strawberry shortcake. What a cute dog, ps - bundle of energy and very positive, especially for a pit. Anyway, I left her with one potato, at which point I wondered if that would be healthy for the dog should she choose to eat it, but I figured, "it's a potato, ya know?"

Also, it was great seeing some of my friends there; mad ups to Sabs, JBad, Kevin (Eddis), Nick & Lynne - love love & rep rep to all...

NOTE: My new intention - solely because I figure I need to have some motivation - is to give out Viaza's 'babies' one by one on an as-needed basis. I figure this accomplishes more than just the 'assigment.' Nukegrrl, I hope I have your blessings on this one.

DAY EIGHT: Just work. No stories. How the hell you expect me to follow Hempfest, honestly???

Piece.
Peas.
Peese.
PEACE.


EV

[EviLKat]

Originally posted by balloon kitten
^^^
^^^
That was a waste of too much free time.

The Pokemon? Nah, I stole it from a website.

[evilarchangel68]

Originally posted by HexRei
*does "best mod ever" dance*

<--- fully of wacky dances

it doesnt compare to my drunken lampshade-on-the-head dance!

*dances and jiggles around with lampshade on head*

i win

*dances*

and god damimt, why the fuck are so many people throwing $30 naf shows that only have like 3 headliners? christ. go to promoter school or something, cause that aint right

[Nukegrrrl]

I hope Viaza had as much fun at Hempfest as I did. Did she get a pretty sticker to wear from the donation bucket people?
Giving her tater babies away is a nice idea, and here's how to bake potatoes for future reference:

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Scrub potatoes, and poke a few holes in their skin with a fork or knife. If you rub olive oil or butter on their skins, they come out soft and flavorful, but it is not necessary.
Place them on a rack in the oven and take them out in 1-1.5 hours. Enjoy them with chives or the toppings of your choice.

Peace,
Jenney :)

[EV]

Day Nine, August 19th

Nothing exciting whatsoever. Not for Viaza, at least;)

See ya tomorrow aka later today.


EV

[EV]

Day Ten, August 20th

Well, big news on the potato front. I mean, relatively, of course.

My cublicle was upgraded to an office today - Woo Hoo - in a completely different location, surrounded by new people...

This group is definitely more upbeat...and curious, as the questions were rolling like a first-year KaNdiKId, radiating in all of her PLURy brilliance. For whatever reason, this group of engineers (and their respective A.A.'s) were much more inclined and enthusiastic about the 'Assignment,' one (Estelle) going so far as to suggest that she give her child - 12 years old - the same project so as to teach him/her "some responsibility" because he/she "has a lot of growing up to do." 'Hmmm,' I wondered, 'do I really want to be working directly with these people?'
Some other comments of note included the typical "do we get to eat these when you're done?" (Kevin C.) -and- "what are you going to do when they start sprouting?" (Pam).
Interesting (again, relatively)...

Well, that's it for now but I'll holler if anything comes up. Sorry if this is starting to bore the crap out of people, but hey - an obligation is an obligation and I like to think of myself as someone with pretty decent follow through so thanks for sticking it out with me thus far...


EV

[groove_E]

LOL, this is fuckin hilarious! Keep it up man, I hope ya make it all 30 days

Eric

[SunshineGirlie]

i am almost inspired to do the potato assignment myself... although i doubt i could live up to EV..... and i dont know how i would feel about taking a sack of potatos to work with me.... ahh well...

keep it up man... its pretty amusing :)

[balloon kitten]

I think someone is posting in here instead of "What beats yer boredom" thread. :D

[Iokera]

I wonder.... will EV make it 30 days without giving up all his taters? At this rate, he'll be out before day 20. I hope you make it man! I like reading these updates. You word them out so they sound like a scientific observational journal, or SOJ, as we scientists who observe and write journals like to call them.....

:confused: :confused: :confused:

That made no sense. I am sorry for that.

*must have sleep*

[EV]

Day Ten, August 20th

The only significant bit of news or story involved spilling Wine all over the f*cking bag. I was pouring two glasses from my trusty four-liter Carlo Rossi Blush bottle, and well...being that the size of the bottle is not exactly conducive to pouring with more than an iota of control, I got a little carried away and overflowed the glass - directly onto Viaza. All over her.

Being that the condition of the bag is 'shoddy' - and that's even using a euphemism - the potatoes were drenched and soaked. Fortunately, and as is evidence of my lack of potato knowledge, there was not too much damage. Potato thin is very thick, and remembering that a potato is actually a root and thus very water compatible, I realized that nothing was really hampered.

Except the bag. The deterioration continues further, now compounded by a distinct stickiness and thin film...

Yes, so this is the culmination of Ten Days of project work. A report on spilling wine in the bag. And I repeat, 'Woo Hoo.'

Umm...Sea ewe late...er.


EV

[Iokera]

Originally posted by LA2SeattlEV
Day Ten, August 20th

[i]The only significant bit of news or story involved spilling Wine all over the f*cking bag. I was pouring two glasses from my trusty four-liter Carlo Rossi Blush bottle, and well...being that the size of the bottle is not exactly conducive to pouring with more than an iota of control, I got a little carried away and overflowed the glass - directly onto Viaza. All over her.

Umm...Sea ewe late...er.


EV

Well son, i think that if this were in your health class, you'd have failed. I don't think that spilling your alcohol on your baby would be considered good parenting. ;)

But don't stop! Go all the way!

peace

[EV]

Day Eleven, August 21

First off, I dangerously overslept this morning. I generally awake at 6:45 and snooze twice. I KNOW that my alarm went off this morning, but my first conscious recognition was seeing the clock's green hue blazing "10:13." This not only places me in the precarious position of dealing with professional concerns, but the explosive potential of actually walking through the office during peak productivity and accordingly, attendance.

Traffic was refreshingly sparse - as is to be expected - and I figured that perhaps I could minimize the negative prospects this prospective predicament by sneaking in through the stairwell; not an easy task when walking up nine floors. However, it was not the Viaza angle that provided the inspiration; it was the sheer will to escape the wrath of any peers, or worse - my boss.

Murphy must have been smiling because as his Law would have it - I was literally intercepted by my boss the absolute SECOND I walked in the office from the stairwell. Her generally positive demeanor was soured, and I am One Hundred Percent certain that my possession of Viaza at that very moment did NOT evoke so much as a modicum of sympathy or willingness to listen to my excuse (in this case, a well-planned and self-rehearsed story on taking my ex- to the airport).

I didn't even bother, and she made a very snide comment, dually infringing upon the feelings of both Viaza & me:

"I hope you have a lot of potatoes because that's all you'll be eating after your next paycheck."

In retrospect, that is clearly nothing greater than a meager attempt at a threat; one that was half-hearted and spurious, at best. At the time, however, it struck a chord...

The remainder of the day was both effortless & bereft of event. I did stay a little later to atone for my tardiness, but the situation was under control...

Nineteen Days Left, Yo(s).


EV

[EV]

Day Twelve, August 22nd

How about some miscellaneous questions for today...
*When do the potatoes start to sprout?
*Are they still edible after thirty (30) days?
*Can I make french fries without one of those french fry grinders?
*If the bag breaks, can I replace it? If so, with what?
*What, really, is the point here?
*Are potatoes the largest crop in Idaho?
*I have this incredible urge to eat one of the potatoes as is; should I know anything before attempting this?

Sorry about the paltry attempt, but a) nothing much happened & b) I feel ill, nauseated, etc...


EV

[EV]

Day Thirteen, August 23rd

Not even halfway, huh? Well that's just swell. At this point, I'm completing the assignment just for the sake of doing so. The only keen, interesting observation I have for today is that the Viaza now needs to be carried like a football for that is the only 'safe' method of ensuring that none of the potatoes fall out. Yippee.

I'll be back.


EV

[EV]

Day Fourteen, August 24th

DAY THIRTEEN UPDATE: Fucking sweet little anecdote about last night. Went to Pomodoro on Eastlake at about 12:40am (great food, ps, and late night dining!) and ended up being the only people in the Restaurant. Fine by me, but the server took it upon herself to literally join me & Deka at the table for the entire duration of our ordering process, from drinks to bread to menus to food. Here's the kicker, though - she was telling us about their 'wonderful food' - it really is, but at the time I was like, "why does she need to talk it up if it's so good" - including the salmon, the fettucine, the garlic mashed potatoes...BOOM, THE MAGIC WORD...so I interrupt and tell this overenthused woman about the project, to which she was all too receptive. I explained my one remaining motivation, the element of giving away potatoes for those that I deem worthy, and she suggested that if I have the potatoes - which of course, I did - she would inquire as to if the chef would prepare one replete with garlic mashed recipe in addition to my meal.

I obliged, while simultaneously wondering if the now-two-weeks-old potatoes would still be fresh, and dutifully excursed to the car to pick the freshest, cleanest potato in the bunch.

She took it, smiled, gave it to the chef/Owner Antolin, who proceeded to smile & nod and agree to the deal...Now truth be told, I was rather curious to the protocol on this, but I guess the fact that we were the last patrons of the night gave them a little bit more leeway...

The food was great, as were the potatoes. I couldn't tell the difference between mine & theirs, but either way it was all delicious and I think a pretty cool story.

As for today (8/24), I was inexplicably struck down with nausea and diarrhea and forced to go to the hospital, where I was treated for Food Poisoning.

JUST KIDDING. Nothing much happened, except for some errands, relaxing and chilling in Kent - after getting lost for about an hour - with MIchelle. Bytheway, 8MM is a ridiculously shitty movie. I think during that scene where Nic Cage is watching the film & cringing, he must have been watching his own damn film...

Hasta te 25th...


EV

[EV]

Day Fifteen, August 25th

Here we are at the halfway point; well, technically the end of the day will be that magic moment but since most of the luster has worn off of this assignment long, long ago, I figure why not celebrate a bit early...

And celebrate I did, let me tell you - a rollicking, exciting, fantastic day of umm...nothing? Well, I can't actually say that because I did get to spend some incredible time with my favorite person on this board - ps, she knows who she is and if you really want to figure it out, it's not very tough - though the potatoes didn't come into play. There they were, sitting right on the kitchen counter, and M.Loraine didn't seem to notice/comment/care, as there were much more important issues at hand;) [kids - get your mind out of the gutter!]

I'll save you the minute details for my own, private LiveJournal - which you won't find on LiveJournal, incidentally - but suffice it to say that I was smiling the entire evening and did not once think about Viaza...

Almost there...must...keep...going...despite...malaise... lethargy...apathy...


EV

[EV]

Day Sixteen, August 26th

Thank you very much for your generous offer of my own forum...

Here I am, and it's a wonder I made it this far. Sixteen days of what? Sitting in a bag, growing lumpy and softer, being tossed around, dropped, spilled on, cooked, given away, teased, barbequed, ignored and manipulated, I can finally see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. Only two weeks left, I keep telling myself. When will this torture cease?

I am a sack of potatoes, for goodness sake - I have feelings! I am not 'just' an Assignment. This is my livliehood; my legacy; my emotions...I have a name, and thus a persona. I do not care to be treated as an object; I am alive as are you!

And my offspring? How dare you take it upon yourself to decide whom receives these bretheren? These are my children, mi familia, la cosa nostra. Each time one member is removed, I become despondent and saddened, thrust that much closer into the depths of despair.

This is not a fair life to live. I yearn, I struggle, I pray, I hope, I wish...for freedom.

!!!Viva Los Potatoes!!!


Viaza

[EV]

Day Seventeen, August 27th

In continuing with yesterday's first-potato theme, we have a sit down interview with Viaza...

EV: Well, we're certainly glad you're able to sacrifice your valuable time for this exclusive NWTekno interview. Thank you for being here.

Viaza: Hey, I'm just glad you finally gave me the opportunity to voice my opinion on this innane Assignment.

E: No problem. Let's start there, Viaza. Why exactly do you consider this to be 'innane?'

V: It's quite simple, is it not? You read yesterday's missive. I'm basically a potato without a home, with an unknown destination, with my family being torn apart on a near-daily basis. In addition, I'm being exploited and there is nothing at all I can do but watch my life get torn apart and scrutinized.

E: Wow, it sounds as if you've done quite a bit of thinking about this.

V: 'Quite a bit of thinking?!?!?' All I do is think! Do you realize what my life has become? I have a monotonous life of sitting on counters, desktops, car floors; I get thrown around and carried like a football; I'm subjected to temperatures that are not at all conducive to a practical living, and all the while, I'm slowly being drained of whatever life remains under my skin.

E: Hmm. Sounds harsh. But you were complicit in your participation in the Assignment, were you not?

V: That is utter bullshit, plain and simple. All I know is that I was siiting at QFC under a wonderfully radiant produce light, and all of a sudden this blonde jackass comes up, feels a few of my friends, molests me, and throws me into his shopping cart, whisking me off to who knows where.

E: Whoa, whoa now, Viaza. 'Blonde jackass?' Let's keep the name-calling to a minimum.

V: I'm sorry; that was wholly inappropriate. I was just venting. The point is, perhaps you are right about my complicity as far as being a potato sack is concerned, but when I left the farm, I only had one goal in mind - to be the best damn baked/sliced/fried sack of potatoes that Washington had to offer. And now? I'm left here, slowly rotting, suffering from maladies unknown to more fortunate potato sacks, all for what? For this?!?!?

In the interest of time, space & chronic attention span shortage, this interview will be completed on Day Eighteen. Please stay tuned.


EV

[mchll888]

*wipes away the tears*
I don't know what you all think but, that is some comedy right there.

[SunshineGirlie]

i especially liked the "blonde jackass" part....
two thumbs up.

[k4y2m0]

maybe if I didn't have a life!

[mchll888]

Originally posted by k4y2m0
maybe if I didn't have a life!
Already quite the little flamer, aren't we? Well do you have one?

[balloon kitten]

Originally posted by mchll888

Already quite the little flamer, aren't we? Well do you have one?
Of course! Kym loves the herb, can't you tell by her name? That's pretty clever, kim. Almost as good as KaNDiKyM would have been. ;)

[EV]

Day Eighteen, August 28th

PART TWO IN A CONTINUING SERIES OF THE EXCLUSIVE NWTekno SIT-DOWN INTERVIEW WITH SELF-PROCLAIMED POTATOSLAVE, VIAZA...

E:Thank you for coming back today, Viaza.

V: Sure thing; I wouldn't miss this for the world. Oh, wait - I DIDN'T HAVE A FUCKING CHOICE, DID I?!?!!? I had to come back today because I have no autonomy, freedom or civil liberties - Fuck you, fuck your controlling bullshit, fuck this entire assignment, fuck making me a pawn in your sick, ill-conceived attempt at self-aggrandizement and accomplishment.

E: You know, Viaza - I can end this thing right now. I am not at all obligated to give you this forum, and regardless, you're going to be here for at least 12 more days, so you might as well take what you can get...

V: Fuck you.

E: This is a finite space, and being that we're here at work, I don't have all day to afford you the luxury of a personal soapbox.

V: Fuck you.

E: Okay then, folks. I guess that's it for tod-

V: Fine, fine, fine...it's just catharsis. What am I going to do anyway? I'm ailing, despondent, living my last few moments on this Earth...why not...

E: Thank you. I'm glad you ummm...changed your mind.

V: Well, look - here's what I want to get out there to the loyal NWteknophiles: your 'support' and continued viewing of this forum amounts not to increased awareness of the potato plight, but to exploitation and unfair treatment of me, my kin, and the Solanum Tuberosum; this is tantamount to Sinclair's The Jungle, in my eyes.

E: First off, you don't have eyes. Secondly, aren't you being a little melodramatic?

V: Wouldn't you like to think so - that's probably the exact question asked to potatoes directly preceeding the Great Potato Famine in Ireland during the 1840's. It all starts out simple enough; just one kiniving, manipulative asshole accepting a proposal directly leading to the misuse and veritable waste of a simple potato family. At first, it's all cute and fun until one by one, the potatoes are given away, destroyed and otherwise philandered. Next thing you know, that very same bastard - blonde jackass, in our case - spreads word of these actions with some hackneyed, deranged sense of pleasure and joy. The children of his generation take notice of this sick pleasure and decide to carry around their own potato sacks. All of a sudden, potatoes are everywhere; burning in sun-drenched backyards, impaled on car antennae, unnaturally mashed in the streets, hooked on heroin, booze and cheap hookers. It's the natural progression of this phenomenon; unfortunately, I don't think it can be avoided at this point. How can a species survive these conditions? This needs to be halted NOW.

E: Umm...okay, Viaza. I think somebody's been baking in the sun a little too long...

V: Fuck you.

E: And we'll call it a day, folks. Thanks for tuning in. Until next time, this has been your loyal host, LA2SeattlEV.

No disrespect intended to the 3+million Irish that lost their lives due to starvation and rebellious potato-accruers from 1846-1850.


EV

[MC Junglitachi Magic Wand]

Originally posted by HexRei
Not for a long long time, but in the meantime they sprout creepy tentacle roots.

Sounds like a really bad Anime porno

[EV]

Day Nineteen, August 29th

Hello. I'm basically just checking in today. Whoopty fucking do.
Here's some great, exciting, scintillating potato info to keep you entertained while I wait for the next witty epiphany:

http://www.bonsaipotato.com/
(The name pretty much says it all, here)

http://www.hasbropreschool.com/mrpotatohead/
(Mr. Potato Head Official Site)

http://www.fun1st.com/mrpotato.html
(Pretty Funny MPH site)

http://www.potatoengine.com/potatolinks1.htm
(Most Requested Potato Sites)

http://www.potatohelp.com/
(POTATO HELP!!!)

http://www.npcspud.com/links.html
(The National Potato Council)

http://www.cipotato.org/gilb/Pubs/newsltr/potlinks.htm
(the International Potato Center)

http://www.solanum.net/potlinks.htm
(Potato Related Websites)

Yipee!!!

Have a good weekend, kids.


EV

[EV]

Day Twenty, August 30th

Viaza, recovering from shock therapy* recevied due to improper conduct relating to the NWTekno exclusive interview, spent the entire day sitting on the floormat of my car...


EV

*a la One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

[EV]

Day TwentyOne, August 31st

A Wonderful, spectacular Saturday, though unfortunately Viaza is becoming more & more of an afterthought. Basically, I'm counting down days until I can chuck the rest of her potato babies at passing cars and bystanders from my balcony...

I did attend Dynamo Forever, but she remained in the car, due to the behest of my lovely passenger, Mchll888. No love lost there, trust me. Anyway, had a good time at the party; a really good time, so you can read the review in "Event Reviews." Granted, my review was pretty paltry, but I was cracked the eff out, so whaddya want?

We're almost there...FINALLY.


EV

[EV]

Day TwentyTwo, September 1st

Sundays to relax...Sundays to relax...
So I did. Went to Black Diamond, bowled a little bit, saw the family, rode bikes, broke up with Deka; you know - just the usual potato-laden type stuff...

Bday Bday Bday Bday*tomorrow*Bday Bday Bday Bday
SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET



EV

[EV]

Day TwentyThree, SEPTEMBER 2ND

Hell yeah...Wonderful Bday, waking up & falling asleep with just the right person;)

Doing exactly what I wanted to do...and not a potato in sight.
I think Viaza has been permanently banished to the rear right floor mat of my Jeep.


EV

[EV]

Day TwentyFour, September 3rd

Today was another work day. Yipee. Good bye.


EV

[EV]

Day TwentyFive, September 4th

Wednesday.
Get over the hump.
Viaza is still in good health, though quite ornery.


EV

[EV]

Day TwentySix, September 5th

Trying to stay focused...Eyes on the prize...Almost there.

My boy Tim came in from L.A. today, at least. He was dumbfounded by not only the potatoes, but the whole screwy idea. Thanks to Nukegrrl, I explained, I am fraught with an overwhelming sense of obligation to complete the assignment. At least rockin the spots with homey helped breathe new life into the Viaza project, because frankly it's been less than an afterthought as of late.

Anyway, hit up Adobo Taco Lounge...sweet as hell.

Oh and ps - the bag is officially broken and thus will not leave the car for the duration of the Assignment.



EV

[EV]

Day TwentySeven, September 6th

Wake 'n bake (woke n' boke?), took the day off of work - mad chill in the sunshine. Took in Capitol Hill - including Lake View Cemetary with Bruce & Brandon, peeped Fremont & walked around the U-District.
Also picked up my friend Bryan - also from L.A. - and reunited the power triumverate of old school homies...Good times all around, especially at Aristocrat's with Michelle Loraine;).
Oh, and Viaza.

THREE MORE DAYS!!!


EV

[EV]

Day TwentyEight, September 7th

The first legitimate excitement for Viaza in weeks.
Unfortunately, it came at the expense of my car, most specifically the
right front window.

I went to Wild Things @ Naf and parked in Lot 115. Showed up late and drunk (sorry), but straightened out enough to have a good ass time to try & enjoy some Christopher Lawrence (ouch - NO SHOW:() and that dude in the light blue Yankee hat that spun afterward. Saw some folks - Michelle, Shoshanna, Sage & A-Ro and actually danced like fuck.

Unfortunately, when we came out to the car at 5(ish), I noticed a baseball clete lying in a puddle of glass directly adjacent to my car. Immediately sensing a 'fuck Naf' kind of reaction, I grabbed ahold of myself long enough to assess & address the situation. Luckily, nothing was stolen except for my baseball bag (there's a post on it in CD)...
The thief did not steal my CD's, cell phone charger, sunglasses, radio or anything else (thank God). Why the FUCK would somebody want to steal baseball equpiment? I don't know, but I would have been so fucking mad if my CD's were stolen.

Point is, Viaza was badly damaged in the rummaging, as the already destroyed bag was further obliterated, and two potatos were ground into a quasi-pulp on my rear left floormat. A sad day for Viaza, I must say. But at least there's only TWO DAYS LEFT.


EV

[EV]

Day TwentyNine, September 8th

The morning was spent recovering from the previous evening's transgressions;)

Headed out to Pike's Place to do the touristy thing with B & T, had some bomb ass clam chowder, and went to hang out & smoke at some park. Pretty chill, Lazy Days style...Going to Yo, Son tonight, though - holler if you roll through.


EV

[EV]

Day Thirty, September 9th

Final-fucking-ly. To celebrate Day Thirty of "The Most Worthless Project/Assignment I've Ever Volunteered For," I chose to destroy what remained of Viaza, item by item.

There were eleven potatoes in the bag by the end of the Assignment.
These are the methods of discard for each potato:

#1: Chucked off balcony, aiming for dumpster across the way, ended up hitting roof of white Corolla.
#2: Chucked off balcony, aiming for dumpster, richocheted off of dumpster exterior.
#3: Sliced violently with knife.
#4: Chucked against side wall of apartment complex from estimated distance of 60 feet.
#5: Ran over with my car.
#6: Ran over with my car.
#7: Strategically placed in middle of street to be run over by (not my) car.
#8: Given to passing by Mastiff, who briefly held it in his (her?) mouth, slobbered on it and dropped it.
#9: Placed in corner of balcony in hopes that continuous, direct sun would play out an interesting finale to this potato's life.
#10: Hit with makeshift baseball bat (basically a wooden plank).
#11: Stabbed repeatedly with same knife from #3.

Very cathartic, as was NOT this project.
Nor did I learn much. Nor was it very fun.
But I did it. So there ya go.
Thanks to those of you that supported, posted, or PM'med.


EV

[SunshineGirlie]

*claps*

[KiddyRaver]

yay you did it

[Fire_Princess]

EV I have to say that was the FUNNIEST fucking shit I have had the privelige (sp?) in a long damned time. Props to you for completing your mission. You Fucking Rock
-J

[groovinkim]

i just now read this thread, and it was hilarious.

therefore, it was not pointless, since it's been a long time since i read anything the slightest bit funny on nwtekno.

:D

i also have this big thing of potatoes my mom gave me and no idea what to do with the damn things and now i have some links for potato recipes.

[balloon kitten]

Originally posted by groovinkim
i just now read this thread, and it was hilarious.

therefore, it was not pointless, since it's been a long time since i read anything the slightest bit funny on nwtekno.

:D
You want funny stuff? Add this to your faves:

http://www.nwtekno.org/vb/search.php?s=&action=finduser&userid=9750

:D

[mchll888]

Although I highly doubt your potatoes could really talk...........I thought I told you to lay off the drugs.....;)

[TriPtoNyTE]

congrads, i couldnt have done it. The journals were funny as hell

[moonpuppy]

You are so cool you have no idea. I just found this page two days ago and you have enlightened my life. Good work...

[Nukegrrrl]

Way to go, LA2SeattlEV! :)

Even though the assignment ended up as being pointless and non-carthartic, I'm sure it was gratifying when you got to throw the potatoes at cars and run them over. It's always gratifying to throw produce at cars.

Will you ever look at a potato the same way you used to before this project? Thanks so much for making my month fun!

Peace,
Jenney