Post Your Text Messages

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Yeah, I know there's a Post Your Aim Conversations thread. This similar topic gets it's own thread because you're only allowed to post ONE message. No conversations, just one text message at a time. They can stay anonymous if necessary.


I'll go first. I got this gem from Carleen last week:

"3 asian girls are making fun of me or american girls in general, in their language. I'd skin and eat them but I'd just be hungry again in ten minutes."




Post em! I know your cell phones are goldmines of text messaging hilarity. . . or horror.

[BettieRage]

"I'm in big trouble!" - My brother, at 2:04 AM, just after he handed Officer Bonner his registration & liscence. The question: WHY was he text messaging me in the middle of getting pulled over?!

[Gucci Smoochies]

From my boyfriend while we were at the movies seeing BrokeBack Mountain

"Have you seen my balls? I seem to have lost them."

[AliciaisAlwaysPimpin]

god! none of my messages are this entertaining. All mine are like "i am in the cafeteria! meet me there" or "what is going on tonight?"

the only mildly entertaining one I got recently says "Alicia, stop poking at the cupcakes!"...I was running a bakesale at the time of the message.

[dislocatedlogic]

I really need to re-enable my SMS.

[DJ Sexz]

from my best friend Aubrie ..

"For some reason my jaw hurts, But i didn't suck dick so i dont know whats going on"

LOL

[***DRUKORE***]

"hi"

yeah I don't know who its from

[DjDotCom]

a txt form a friend who try's to fit in SSOOOOO bad

im arolllannnn sooooo harerd

after mah buddies tircked him into taking a fake bomb lol

[SomeCh!cksmom]

oh man.

this could get a lot of people in big trouble.

random BTC text from about a year ago

"my pants are in the oven, and naha's shoes are on the counter. please call me asap to discuss"

[SomeCh!cksmom]

Originally posted by Vinyl Diva
From my boyfriend while we were at the movies seeing BrokeBack Mountain

"Have you seen my balls? I seem to have lost them."

ask your dog.


:eek:

[BettieRage]

"I just woke up in the hallway?" -Brother, 10/21/05, 2:02 AM

He was staying at my parents house for a little while, i dropped him off there after a night of drinking, and he woke up laying in the hallway and had no clue how he got there.

[~Bliss~]

"not just a beard tonight, it's a goatee"

and that's about a chick we see sometimes :P

"Im gonna shit myself hurry please Jessica Ann"

"I asked santa for a condom, he gave me 3. I asked him for a dollar, he gave me 10. I asked him for a ho and he gave me this number. Happy holidays"

"I think I just saw xibit" <-- my friend who lives in hollywood

[SomeCh!cksmom]

hahahah im going through my old ones. i knew there was a reason i don't delete anything.

from hoffa on christmas 2 years ago

"wu-tang clan aint nuttin to fuck wit"

[Gucci Smoochies]

Originally posted by SomeCh!cksMom
ask your dog.


:eek:

Only you and I will get that joke. Everyone else will assume peanut butter needs to be part of the equation.

[FUCKINMETAL]

white out everywhere. They took it away from me today. Yesterday the bottle exploded. Today I got bored and painted a post-it scuplture with it.

From my friend reno who works at cingular. Apparently the fraud dept can be really slow...

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Subject: Road Kill
Message: Got creamed by a car this morning. Drunk and Bleeding. Call me.

~Denise

[Car2n]

Originally posted by dajah

I'll go first. I got this gem from Carleen last week:

"3 asian girls are making fun of me or american girls in general, in their language. I'd skin and eat them but I'd just be hungry again in ten minutes."
.
yeah those broads were annoying. It was the most blatant "you don't know our language and your outfit doesn't match" convo i've heard or thought I heard at least.

I'm perpetually texting around 5 people throughout the day. I'll start saving some of the convos. Only about 1/5 are ever serious so my phone is usually graced with some gems of perversion, vulgarity, and inside joke goodness.

[Car2n]

"i'm the only person I know with a jar of extra chunky peanut butter and an emergency pack of easy mac in their desk at work. I bet you don't have a note written to you by a 97 year old either. OR an aflac duck."
one I sent to a friend when we were comparing desks.

[SomeCh!cksmom]

another random btc message

"duck. the robots are coming"

he's such a liar.

[galoux]

"Where am i?"
~ my friend in the middle of a work day. from the smoking room.

[Gucci Smoochies]

From Irina this morning:

I'm sending you a textg message so you can mention it on NWtekno, in an appropriate threat. Whatta publicity stunt.

[Car2n]

"fuck I just got ANOTHER speeding ticket!" - Dajah


we're both notorious lead foots.

[DJ Sexz]

" Do you wanna just shoot me ? If not I will shoot you. I have an urgent to shoot you Jane! lol" - Aubrie

[DnBassics]

"Gawd I love you. Wanna be my butler?"

- Dj Procon, aka justin the hick from alabama

[djvlastimil]

"THE LIFE OF A VAGINA: My hairs a mess, my relatives are lippy, my neighbor is an asshole, my best friends a dick, & my owner keeps giving me the finger..."

There is always the one guy that sends you shit like this. It's gotta be nice to have nothing better to do than poke at your cell phone all day.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Originally posted by Car2n
"fuck I just got ANOTHER speeding ticket!" - Dajah


Technically it was:

I just got ANOTHER fucking speeding ticket! Goddamn it. Fuck!

:D

Viva la lead foots.

[DnBassics]

ole!

[Car2n]

"they are so lucky there are pop tarts in the vending machine or I wouldn't have come back."

[hurlesk]

This was a text I got on Friday from a friend who was in the grocery store getting beer. She asked what we wanted and I told her definitely Guinness for St. Patty and just get a mix of whatever else, didn’t really matter because she knew everyone’s tastes. This was her response …

“Got it. Do birds piss or shit or mix of both? Only one hole?

hurlesk

[lisam]

i've got to have some comedy relief before my brain explodes. it's in murder suicide crying murder suicide murder murder suicide murder more crying mode right now.

so my silly text messages might be those you had to be there moments, but they entertained me:
"i just took a shit the size of a horse cock"
-anonymous

"this is dumb, let's go fuck"
-me, at en last night, dunno if that's a-game or grief stricken game.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

http://static.flickr.com/43/120384153_3b629ba72e.jpg

VOTE FOR PEDRO

[djsence]

Everyone bring duct tape!!!

[texas chainsaw mascara]

http://static.flickr.com/36/120384152_d362304e79.jpg

Louie's getting warmed up in the oven.

[annabelle]

"somehow i ended up next to the frigde, jungle room upstairs come save me vip area"


my friend jim at zoolu 12 alstarz this mardi gras HA!

edited for a pic
i was thinking and i have a pic of when i found him lol

http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a275/ButterflyPepsiKitten/mardi%20gras/mejimandmicha.jpg

[justavisitor]

Originally posted by dajah
http://static.flickr.com/43/120384153_3b629ba72e.jpg

VOTE FOR PEDRO
*off topic.
LOL. pedro is a raver. actually, raver & promotor as well.


*back on topic.
my random text messages:
"Whats up dutchess of chode BOO-YAH!"
"You're a smelly pirate hooker!"

my friends are so nice. haha.

[Car2n]

you know you've sent a good text message to Dajah when she calls you back yelling "I'M CALLING TO LET YOU KNOW THAT I ALMOST CRASHED MY GODDAMN CAR OFF THE SIDE OF THIS HIGHWAY AT 85 MPH AFTER READING YOUR FUCKING TEXT. THAT WOULD RAISE MY CAR INSURANCE $500. JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW!! *click*"

Text
Would you be willing to teleport me food if I were to tell you that you could save 15% on your car insurance by switching to HELLER?

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Hahahhahhaha!! Seriously. I was speeding through HELLER heavy traffic on I-95 South, turning a corner and was like "Hey, what's this text message from Carleen say?" And then I fucking laughed so hard I almost caused a 15-car pile-up.

The end.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

From Nessa:

I have beer! But my phone doesn't recognize this number . . . But I have beer!




From Kat:

Burn . . . I could always just offer you for a free drink. "That's my friend, but me a drink and she'll do you." They'll never know when we leave the bar.

[BillCosby]

"you should rape him"

[williowstar]

"Friendship is like pissing your pants...everyone can see it but only you can feel the warmth. Thanks for being the piss in my pants. >3"

hahaha...from my friend Jennica

[BettieRage]

"Goin' to jail, see ya thursday-" -My brother. Yes, he was.

"Bring candy party 2 my house" -Mike, and neither him nor I know what he meant by that...

[PDX101]

"Hey motherfucker, warez my car-keys"

"In my back-pak, here in the tron. Where you at?"

"St. John's"

"How the fuck you get over there w/o me seeing you leave"

"Ninja sh!t, biotch"

"Good fuckin ninja you are. Your the only ninja I know that constantly forgets his weapons!"

"shuriken"

"and car keys"

[BettieRage]

Hey PDX101, pay attention to the rules! ;)

Originally posted by texas chainsaw mascara
No conversations, just one text message at a time.

[PDX101]

Originally posted by BettieRage
Hey PDX101, pay attention to the rules! ;)
No
Decon X
"Are you going to send your answer?"

[James Capricorn]

"don't let the hooligans fraternize with the ne'er-do-wells"

[hurlesk]

"Hahaha ... Well, cocaine's pretty expensive. I can't believe my phone knows cocaine lol."

[theperfectcyn]

omg ///lolol //toilet!!!! lol!!! toilet!!

[°*.¤:ÅMÖ§:¤.*°]

"I am now a member of the anti-Sally club."

I've received that text message from two diff people.

[theperfectcyn]

i'm going to starbucks do you want an iced vanilla nonfat frapaSHUTUP?

[James Capricorn]

"moosecock"

[Mandy]

From when I was SUPER tired and didn't think I would be able to drive home, i texted my friend and begged him to come pick me up even though he was carless.

"Oh you mean with my magical car that runs on gumdrops and skittles? Sure, Im on my way. But you will have to sit in back; the Easter Bunny just called shotgun"

[Car2n]

"I just saw a midget with a nice ass."
-CRJ


"HOW DO YOU TALK TO AN ANGEL!!" - me
"you can't. The sound of their voice is not compatable with human ears... and you're risking a cramp or a life threatening blood clot if you try to talk to one." - my friend.
"you buy her a case of rockstar DUH" - me

[texas chainsaw mascara]

This was sent in four parts, but it qualifies as one message.

"How To Not Pick Up The Hot Mexican Jack's Security Guard, an informative guide by author Carleen.
I've been a homebody heller lately and I had a bad day yesterday so Sami, Jewfro and Adam took me out. I think this one mexican security guard is hot at a bar by Jewfro's so we went there to see if he was working, apparently. I told Sami I got his number. But I woke up with a matchbook with my own number, which was wrong.
I gave myself my own wrong phone number."


Hahahhahahaha.

[PDX101]

3/09/06 4:35pm
My Brother -
"The next time you and your girl decide to have sex at my house, could you leave our food out of it?"

Reply

"WTF bro, we ate what we used!"

[Car2n]

Originally posted by texas chainsaw mascara
This was sent in four parts, but it qualifies as one message.

"How To Not Pick Up The Hot Mexican Jack's Security Guard, an informative guide by author Carleen.
I've been a homebody heller lately and I had a bad day yesterday so Sami, Jewfro and Adam took me out. I think this one mexican security guard is hot at a bar by Jewfro's so we went there to see if he was working, apparently. I told Sami I got his number. But I woke up with a matchbook with my own number, which was wrong.
I gave myself my own wrong phone number."


Hahahhahahaha.

bwaahahahahaha the matchbook is in front of me.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Regarding my dislocated shoulder:
"Just rub chapstick on it, you will be fine."


Carleen:
"I don't have a camera phone so you'll just have to trust I'm doing 120."

This after I sent her a picture of my spedometer as I went through Nevada @ 100 MPH a week ago.

[xshank667x]

Fron my brother-

"WTF!!! I Just woke up with a tube of KY and a toy car with a condom in it by my ass...and it's wet!!!"

[theperfectcyn]

"At the vagina examiner. Get him a sword."

[Nukegrrrl]

Originally posted by SomeCh!cksMom
another random btc message

"duck. the robots are coming"

he's such a liar. Who knows?

Maybe BTC is a prophet - the robots could still be coming...

When I had a cell phone, I used to get this message a lot in the wee hours of the mornings on the weekend, from a friend who had a very love/hate relationship with the board and the scene:

"nuke - LET ME OUT!!!!!"

I'm gonna be a bitch and not say who it was, though :p

[cricket]

random message
"ask your mom if you can come over and watch fire works with us "

no I have not lived with my mom for 8 years hahah :+_+:

[NO-ESC]

from Dennis

" PREMO when prep meets emo"

[NO-ESC]

after a night out...
from Taylor-


"Hahahaha u got kicked out of the club. And dad had crazy butt sex with u while u were watching gone with the wind"

[OneHundredFifty]

"I need a tea bagging."

[Nukegrrrl]

Originally posted by OneHundredFifty
"I need a tea bagging." How did Roddimus get your number?

[OneHundredFifty]

Maybe he went digging through the numbers you have saved on your cellphone.

Am I still saved under "Johnny the Pipe Layer"?

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Tim. Ava/Denise. Carleen. Agni.
Match-the-message-to-the-person. ;)

Sun Nov 26th:
"Needles NEED dope. They are oh so lonely without it. They are BFF's."

Sat Nov 25th:
"Call me, you dumb bird."
"Bird sneezes. Ah-tchu."

Tues Nov 21st:
"I need a drink.s.s.s Or a many, many pharmies. Why are there no inter-mall alcohol delivery services? Why am I sober? WHY?!?!?!"


Fri Nov 17th:
"My song to you:
So much, soooooooo much, so much, sooooo much. We're going to have, soooo much so much funs. So much, soooooo much, I'll dare you to drink so much beers."

Sat Nov 11th:
"Wish you were here:
Giant cup of wine and I, waiting for the bus."


Sun Oct 22nd:
"What's crackin pimpin? Getting yur hair did, ma? Aight you know you know."


Sat Sept 30th:
"Cunt face asshole nigga scum fukk... I luv yeeeeeeeew... choke n die. Gimmie bird. No cunt is superior to you. Come here, bird."


:D

[421]

"I have a new car that you won't recognize. I don't know where it is."

[nouseforaname]

"eww- i had cum in my hair and my mom saw it"



i have to meet her parents next weekend :(

[oneandoneisone]

"MANBEARPIG!!!! MANBEARPIG!!! POOTY-COCK"

Secret code from a friend who works at a hair salon downtown, letting me know what a bunch of freaks live in Seattle (us included)

[Spun DJ Academy]

"What's up with gummi bears these days? They've all gone Techno!"

[filthy gorgeous]

"my head wiggles and the swedish fish are alive in my hand."

-my friend Hollywoooooooood

[Jesus H. Christ]

Originally posted by SomeCh!cksMom

"my pants are in the oven, and naha's shoes are on the counter. please call me asap to discuss"

what i wouldnt give...

[+*missdefy*+]

"a pilot needs a cockpit!"- rich

[lisam]

i am sad, whenever i drunk text (and receive drunk texts) i usually delete all my sent and received messages, and so all the gems between friday night and sunday afternoon have gone the way of the dodo.

all i can remember is that most of them were to/from a married man i've been flirting with. /cries

[amberluv]

This was from my boyfriend at last night's Seahawk game.
"
Kingdome may have looked like shit,but at least you never got snowed on."



Aww poor baby =(

[KatSauce]

http://img115.imageshack.us/img115/171/media1gv5.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Happy thanksgiving, here's your turkey!


I got this when i was drunk and nauseaus sp, it didnt help to make me feel better.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

anonymous.
------------------

Jan 1:
"I have no idea where I'm at. My packpack is sauced in the lost. Bird, stat."

Feb 4:
"At least talk to me later tonight. I miss you. Plus if you don't, I'll cut off your head and stuff it into the bird's night-night cage."

Feb 4:
"And at least let me visit The Beak. If you don't, I'll call BPS."

Feb 1:
"BEAK! Are you gonna ever come home? I need you to come hate my face, stat."

Jan 19:
"Yeah, how about I just rape and murder you now, and leave your charred remains in a shallow unmarked grave?"

Jan 12:
"Going to court for kicking a cop in the face! Wish me luck!"

[Joe_Nasty]

"Such a random afterthought, but you were saying that **** has (and probably will in the future) masturbated thinking about you before? I'm totally guilty of that as well."

[A D I D A S]

a few from amos

"I'm sure your roomie will make you some (soup). in exchange for some buttsecks"

"LoL! one of the kids found a cock straw!"

"its only owie hole on blowjob week"

[yewzer]

- "wanna get lucky tonight"

- "why do asian bitches keep squinting at me"

-with a picture of some girl with cock in her mouth "i dunno, should i hit it"

- "U R the biggest mistake i have made this year. and its only january"

<3


i am glad i dont have any embarrasing outgoing messages. especially to dajah. ever.


HI DAJAH!

[djsence]

"Burger king was good."

[JiveTurkeyMoFo]

"My head hurts. I'm not sure exactly where I am and I was attacked by a dog last night. If I figure out where I am you should pick me up and we can eat some Wingdome. Peace out Jon Benet Ramsy" - best friend

[yewzer]

"thanks for posting that on nwt"

[Mee-Shell]

Originally posted by yewzer
"thanks for posting that on nwt"

:p LOL

[OneHundredFifty]

"Dude, I am homeless."

[gingerballs]

"slap a drunk on the ass for me."

[Mee-Shell]

"Doing lines off a stripper's ass isn't as easy as you think!"

[Car2n]

Originally posted by JiveTurkeyMoFo
"My head hurts. I'm not sure exactly where I am and I was attacked by a dog last night. If I figure out where I am you should pick me up and we can eat some Wingdome. Peace out Jon Benet Ramsy" - best friend

wingdome is the shit.

[A D I D A S]

sucha:

"Yeah, but I have to work. And I'm trying really hard not to be gay."

[BettieRage]

My brother: "I had sex today! ...and sex is better than eastern oregon!"

My friend Roger: "I'd get all the virgins an when we got bored with em the crew could have em"

[A D I D A S]

Originally posted by BettieRage



My friend Roger: "I'd get all the virgins an when we got bored with em the crew could have em"

I instantly pictured a farm hand refering to sheep.

[A D I D A S]

from friend:

"Squiddin tonight!"

[xshank667x]

"I want a stripper to have my abortion"

From a friend.

[xshank667x]

"jake is gayer than willie wonka on a preschool picnic"

[A D I D A S]

"its all yours to pass on to any hooker you please.....I want to be reincarnated as a tear upon your face so I can live upon your cheek to die upon your lips."

~pdx shannon

[KatSauce]

"hey hey I had a lovely time last night, we should do it again sometime :)"

-Lydia

We totally had sex like 6.5million times

[sass.bot]

"i swoon for the hot Koennecke women"

-one of my homeboys referring to my sister and i

[JiveTurkeyMoFo]

"answer your phone"

[FREEEZZ]

"Naked bitches rule"

[.-=PSYLON=-.]

"Ok. Im entertaining myself by stealing cars, and killing hookers. Teehee. See you soon, baby."

-My girlfriend, to me. I was at work, and she was at my place playing GTA: Vice city.

"Damn you, and your beautiful knees."

-A co worker of mine, in reference to god knows what.

"In addition to my previous comments, you also have a Bruce Campbell like charm"

I get this one alot, actually.

and last but not least, Our own Zero5:

"(trade 3) WTB Portal from school to Bens house."

(We're both World of Warcraft nerds. Easily the funniest text message i got in months.)

[pill]

meet me 4:00 zestos
bring b' wrap
we got 20 min

[gingerballs]

Originally posted by .-=PSYLON=-.
and last but not least, Our own Zero5:

"(trade 3) WTB Portal from school to Bens house."

(We're both World of Warcraft nerds. Easily the funniest text message i got in months.)

That turned out to be a very good day....

[.-=PSYLON=-.]

Originally posted by Zero5
That turned out to be a very good day....

My memory is a little hazy, but I seem to recall enjoying myself as well.

;)

[A D I D A S]

"JamesCapricorn wants to be friends!! Log into MySpace to accept!"

[gingerballs]

Originally posted by .-=PSYLON=-.
My memory is a little hazy, but I seem to recall enjoying myself as well.

;)

I remember pinball.

[xshank667x]

Tittles for Days.

[A D I D A S]

"ya, bring her over naked. I will tell ya about our outing tomorrow. Hot girls, free drinks and cool people" ~ Dave



"ah i find laughter is best when your cock is in her mouth then its more of a gurgle" ~ Allison

[chronwaxjoseph]

Cell phones are annoying.

[Yungrii Mobliatri]

cell phones are useful. people that use cellphones in obnoxious, loud manners are annoying.



"i found a tiny silly pair of shoes"

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Originally posted by chronwaxjoseph
Cell phones are annoying.

People who refuse to get a cell phone are annoying. They're inaccessible during emergencies, yet they'll constantly borrow MY phone to use whenever they need to do some non-emergency long-distance phone-calling. It's fucking stupid. The year is 2007- get a cell phone already. They're affordable and you are inconveniencing everyone you know by refusing to own one on general principle.

It's possible to have a cell phone and not be an idiot with it. Really.

This is like people who go on self-righteous bullshit crusades against television, when it's relatively easy to just avoid the things that bother you without eliminating the entire technology from your life. Hippies. I hate you.

[kizat]

i love my cell phone.

it takes pictures, it calls my mom, i can dial long distance, and sometimes.. it even helps to get me laid.

*hug cell phone*

[kizat]

"Lol I'm so not putting that up my ass lol that shit is meant for girls lol"

[SixSixFive.5]

Originally posted by texas chainsaw mascara
Hippies. I hate you.
:D

[yewzer]

people who incessantly text instead of just calling annoy me.

i haven't gotten any good messages in awhile.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Originally posted by yewzer
people who incessantly text instead of just calling annoy me.

i haven't gotten any good messages in awhile.

I sent you digital boobies yesterday. Give me a break. I'm trying at least.

[yewzer]

LIES!
i had to check the internet like everyone else.

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Originally posted by yewzer
LIES!
i had to check the internet like everyone else.

They looked like this:
(.) (.)

I only had the text message technology. Could not take real-life picture since I was standing on PSU campus. I'll make it up to you. someday.
Ok, probably I won't. But at least I care.

[burnt]

"I just took a shower and I'm all clean an snuggly. Too bad you're not here!"

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Princess Kat just texted me a random picture of her boobs.

I win.

[b-eazyy]

Originally posted by burnt
"I just took a shower and I'm all clean an snuggly. Too bad you're not here!" -QUICKSTER

roommate love! how sweet

[burnt]

Originally posted by texas chainsaw mascara
Princess Kat just texted me a random picture of her boobs.

I win.

I got a pic texted to me of a girl wearing black panties and red heels. sassy. I'm gonna hold onto that one until the end of days...

*sigh*
thanks Beck. yea, the gay roommate jokes aren't getting old or anything..
:rolleyes:

[kizat]

Originally posted by texas chainsaw mascara
Princess Kat just texted me a random picture of her boobs.

I win.

"that'll be on nwtekno within the hour"

I'm really bored at work.. you're lucky it wasn't a picture of my vag...


at least my boobs are nice.. :)

[xshank667x]

And why didnt I get this text?!? lol

[kizat]

i dont have your number?

[RichPoor]

"So.....Not coming up with my friend? You don't want any threesome action?"

I do not get these everyday but finally I have somewhere to share it. The answer was no...I'm a one woman man.......No really I just didn't want to pay for the $75 in gas to get there and $75 back.. I guess I should have asked what her girlfriend looked like first though. :(

[*LyNnZ*]

"Sweet did you shower together? please dont be to much of a whore with my girlfriend while im gone"

that was from my best friend the other night :)

[texas chainsaw mascara]

Originally posted by Princess Kat
"that'll be on nwtekno within the hour"


I just sent you that. It's a NWTekno post about a text message about NWTekno. Quick, send me a text about this one. Then I'll post it here. It'll be really clever.

[yewzer]

"nickleback is coming to seattle!" inside joke, but funny as fuck.

[Gucci Smoochies]

Me: Coke tastes pretty plain without rum
Charles: Yes it does.
Me: Its just so pathetic. Almost virginal
Charles: Mmmmmm virgins

[Yungrii Mobliatri]

Originally posted by Vinyl Diva
Me: Coke tastes pretty plain without rum
Charles: Yes it does.
Me: Its just so pathetic. Almost virginal
Charles: Mmmmmm virgins

blech. i fucking hate rum and cokes. dont get me wrong, if one magically appears in front of my drunken face than it will be drank in a hot second but that doesnt mean they taste good.

i will take my rum as a shot and my coke as a chaser..

[Gucci Smoochies]

I like them over lots of ice and with cherry coke preferably. :) And it has to be spiced rum.

That was written on a Monday after I was drinking them all weekend for the heck of it. It was kind of hot so I thought, why the hell not? My "chaser" drinks or in between drinks are malibu and pineapple.

Yes, I have a vagina. It's allowable.

[Yungrii Mobliatri]

Originally posted by Vinyl Diva
I like them over lots of ice and with cherry coke preferably. :) And it has to be spiced rum.

That was written on a Monday after I was drinking them all weekend for the heck of it. It was kind of hot so I thought, why the hell not? My "chaser" drinks or in between drinks are malibu and pineapple.

Yes, I have a vagina. It's allowable.


ha!

how did sweet flavors ever become associated with the feminine? what the fuck is that?

[Gucci Smoochies]

I dont know. I just know I can drink foo foo drinks with fruit in them and Josh has to take sips lest he be labeled gay or something. Not that I care; I'm a fag hag for christ sakes - the more the merrier! :) But even so, he would never order one, especially in the company of men.

[Tachie]

"I'm trying to sink your battle ship"


WTF? lol

[Star_Dancer]

Originally posted by Vinyl Diva
Me: Coke tastes pretty plain without rum
Charles: Yes it does.
Me: Its just so pathetic. Almost virginal
Charles: Mmmmmm virgins

That one's still on my mobile.

mmhhhh.... virgins!

[A D I D A S]

"I really miss fucking your cock n cant wait to make you cum all over me. U turn me on so much u lil sec machine YUMMY!!!"

[A*Raye]

Delivered in January...I'll never delete this gem

"We tattoo cold soup on our hands'"

[yewzer]

you coming to work today?

[Raichu]

"it was scary small like a clown car or something"

referencing one of the "smart cars" that had at least 4 people in it, i think 5 htough

http://www.sbhonline.com/Smart%20Car.jpg
now picture 4 more people in it.

it was insanity

[djsence]

Bbq salmon 2nite?

[Tasty]

what?

[Emperor]

25 for you

[Gucci Smoochies]

Originally posted by Star_Dancer
That one's still on my mobile.

mmhhhh.... virgins!


LOL. That was fantastic. I like how it continues about how they won't be virgins when you're done. My argument is that because you're godly it won't count.

Case in point: Zeus' various lovers were still considered virgins after they bore him children.

So there :p

[A D I D A S]

"you could still come up for a quickie"

"shit, what am I saying? I have a boyfriend"

[bgirl503]

i saved your drunk mess

and

it could be worse you could be a pig farmer

[quickster]

"I am always amazed at not only the quality but the quantity of my poo.. I barely eat lately and yet i have had two hefty poops today."

-Princess Kat